eHarmony for Pastors and Churches

Check it, yo.

Finally, here’s a way to guarantee (or your money back) getting a pastor who does what you want, not what he wants. He’ll preach what you want him to preach, for exactly the right amount of time. He’ll work for the salary you want to pay him. He won’t offend you (unless you’re into that kind of thing). And you’ll likewise be the perfect congregation for him. You won’t ask too much of him or make too many demands that conflict with his social life. You won’t expect him to step too far out of his comfort zone. And you won’t get upset when he forgets your names (unless you’re into that kind of thing).

Timotheos